Skinny Jeans and the Laughing - Crying Face Emoji

As I sat down to write this blog post, I remembered a phrase I used to use a lot when I was a middle school youth minister: "Saints are made in middle school." Every who knew me as a youth minister knew that I was passionate about the 11-14 age group, and every parent I came across probably heard me say at some point that "even Jesus went to middle school youth group." I felt pretty confident that although I was old enough to be the mother of the kids I ministered to, I was able to keep up with the trends that interested them and the shows, music, and movies that they found relevant. And for better or worse, the kids made me think that this capability wasn't just imagined. I promised myself that I would always know how to relate to the generations below me.

Imagine my surprise when I learned this week that skinny jeans are out of style and the laughing - crying face emoji is only used by "people who are well over 30." Ok, granted, I am about to enter the fourth floor of life, but all this time I had been thinking that the laughing - crying face emoji was still being used by the high schoolers I now work with - it's not. Apparently, the skull and bones has replaced it, as in "I'm dead laughing. Deceased."

On the other hand, I questioned why it was so important to me to stay in step with adolescents. Does it really matter that my closet doesn't look like theirs and my screen time isn't spent the same way as theirs? Do I really need to take advice from kids who thought eating Tide pods was a good idea? Why do people get obsessed with staying young? I struggle with it, too, but I'm happy that my medicine cabinet has been void of Clearasil for years only to be replaced by face cream meant to reduce the signs of wrinkles. I'm not saying that 40 is the new 30. Rather, it's such a blessing to live in abundantly at whatever age you're at in the present moment. There were things that I loved about being 15 and 21, and there are things that I also love about being 39.

Yesterday I had the opportunity to help facilitate a mother-daughter retreat. The adolescent daughters spent the day with their mothers processing emotional habits and celebrating the unique bond that only mothers and daughters can know. We ended the day treasuring the roles of mother and daughter, recognizing that they are different but both valuable. Although I'm not a mom, I have a mom. And I found myself thinking about how valuable she is at the age of 79 with wisdom and experience that I can't imagine at 39. Rather than age being something to be afraid of, it's something I can look forward to.

But for now, I'm going to appreciate 39. It's a time in life when I no longer have to question what I value most or face the insecurity of whether or not I can make it in the real world - because I know that I can. I may not be able to eat pizza everyday and stay up all night anymore, but I'm also not yet concerned with orange pill bottles. While there is still some uncertainty in where I'll be in 10 years, there's also stability that I have come to appreciate. I've also come to the realization that just as much as I need my mom at 79, someone out (maybe a girl in her teens or 20s) there needs me to be who I am at 39.

And so, I close this with appreciation for 39. And I ask the people who read this to do the same with whatever age they are at